Wedding - Couple Information

Updated 21 July 2008

The following information applies to a wedding or a blessing of a civil wedding.

To be married in the Anglican Church of Canada, the bride and groom must be aged 18 or older (if between 16 and 18, see the clergy). One of them must be baptized and both must be free to marry. The wedding must be booked sixty days in advance.

The place for a Christian wedding is normally a church. If St. Stephen's building is too small, discuss it with the clergy and the clergy can arrange for a larger Anglican Church building. 

As of June 2004, General Synod (the legislature of the Anglican Church of Canada) amended the Marriage Canon, allowing a wedding to take place in a location other than a church, as long as the sacred and public nature of Christian marriage will be upheld. In the Diocese of Algoma, the couple must be worshiping at the parish church in order for the clergy to do a wedding elsewhere.

The wedding fee for a wedding at St. Stephen's is $300 or at a location different from St. Stephen's $200, $50 payable to St. Stephen's before marriage preparation, and the remainder at the wedding. It includes marriage preparation inventory, the clergy's time and use of the church building for the wedding. This fee is waived if the couple is financially supporting St. Stephen's through envelope offerings. An honorarium may be given to the clergy, but it is not required. To rent Parish Hall; see Parish Hall Rental.

Marriage preparation consists of filling in an inventory, which is sent away to be processed and the clergy discusses it with the couple over a minimum of two sessions. Sometimes an additional one day marriage preparation course is offered.

The Anglican Churches in the city of Thunder Bay are cooperating in a marriage preparation course that runs Friday night and Saturday. Topics include a personality assessment (Kiersey Bates), intimacy, communication skills, conflict management, financial management, children and parenting, and spirituality of marriage and a candle light dinner ends the gathering. Courses are offered in February, May and September. A fee is charged for the course. Couples are encouraged to take the course, and it is in addition to what is done privately with the clergy. Couples that have taken the course tell us that they find it was a positive experience.

If the bride and/or groom has been divorced and the former spouse is still alive, an application is made to the Diocese of Algoma Matrimonial Commission for permission to have the wedding or blessing of a civil marriage conducted by Anglican clergy. The clergy will help the couple fill in this application. Its purpose is to ensure any commitments from previous marriage(s) are maintained and to help prepare the couple for marriage by learning from the previous marriage(s). The Commission usually meets on the 1st Friday of each month and needs the application in Sault Ste. Marie 10 days in advance of the meeting. The application is completed after the marriage preparation. There is no fee for the application to the Matrimonial Commission.

If the bride or groom is Roman Catholic, for the marriage to be recognized by the Roman Catholic church, a dispensation from Canonical form is required. Contact the Roman Catholic parish clergy at least six months before the wedding. There is provision for Anglican and Roman Catholic clergy to do the wedding service together. If the bride or groom is divorced, the marriage will not be recognized unless an annulment is obtained from the Roman Catholic Church annulling the previous marriage.

The couple may have the banns read during a worship service instead of purchasing a license. For the reading of the banns, the congregation should know the bride or groom. If the bride or groom has been divorced, the couple must have a license, and the banns may still be read.

The clergy are a good resource for helping the couple to plan their wedding. To plan the wedding, the following paragraphs will need to be discussed with the clergy.

For the wedding service the couple has the options on whether or not to have Eucharist, and which service book to use. The Book of Alternative Services (BAS) is the newer book and the wedding service begins on page 541, or page 528 with Eucharist. When the BAS is used the couple have the choice of scriptures found on page 549, and the choice of people reading the scriptures and prayers. The Book of Common Prayer (BCP) is the older book and the wedding service begins on page 564. 

The parish may print a bulletin, which has an order of service that refers people to the service book (BAS or BCP). If the couple would like special paper, they must provide it. If the couple prints their own bulletin, the clergy must approve it before it is printed. For a wedding at a location other than an Anglican church, a bulletin that contains the wedding service is necessary so the people attending can take part.

For music at St. Stephen's, the couple makes arrangements with the parish Music Director. Her fee is $75.00 and the couple pays her directly. To use another organist, the parish organist must grant permission for that person to have access to the digital piano, and she is to receive her usual fee. The music should be sacred. Other instrumentalists or special soloists may be engaged with the permission of the organist and clergy. Check with the clergy if the couple has questions or needs further suggestions. 

For flowers and decorations the couple makes their own arrangements, however, two bunches of fresh cut flowers for the altar are requested, and the Altar Guild changes the hangings to white. The clergy has the Altar Guild President's phone number, and the couple will need it to contact her to coordinate their arrangements with the Altar Guild.

A wedding candle is optional. It is actually two small candles lit by mothers/parents/family before the service begins and just before the register is signed, the couple uses them to light the single, larger wedding candle. The couple purchases the candles and keeps them afterwards. The Altar Guild has candle holders and can be of assistance in purchasing the candles.

Pictures may be taken as the bridal party processes in and as the wedding party leaves. During the wedding service pictures are not taken as it is a worship service. Pictures may be posed after the service.

The service may be video taped as long as the camera operator stays in one place and does not distract people from the service.

For an outdoor service, the couple are encouraged to obtain a public address system. Plans should be made for bad weather.

It would be appreciated if confetti was not thrown as it is difficult to clean up.